I Want You To Know Me

I want you to know all of me. I want you to know the thoughts that go through my head when I feel at my lowest point and I'm petrified I'm never going to recover.

I want you to know that I have a panic attack almost every time I drive by a particular spot while listening to the music that makes me sad. I want you to know that I couldn't just switch off the music and try driving through in silence because I want you to know me well enough to realise that that would be an impossibility.

I want you to know when I'm hurting so badly all I want is for you to intuitively know that I'm sad and in pain, and to come over and just hold me for a little while. Without me thinking that I'm manipulating you in to coming over and spending time with you, whether you believe that too or not.

I want you to know when I'm so scared of seeing daylight because it means that I've survived another night and now I have to survive another day.

I want you to know these things about me because I want to stop lying. I want to stop lying to you about the person I am and start being honest about all the parts of me. I want you to know me because I want you forever to be my friend, and I won't be able to keep up the farce.

I want you to know me and still think I'm worth knowing.