The new year is always such an interesting time. You feel like you have to begin again, become a new person, start again... But it's such an arbitrary date. Who decided it would be 1 January anyway?
And what if you don't start again? What if you continue as you were? What if there's no new start for you, just more of the same? When do you get your new beginning again? And how do you know that's it?
I want to start again. I want my life to begin over again but with the knowledge I have now. Would I change any of it? Doubtful. But at least I'd know where I was going.
I want to reach the end of my life and start again knowing all there is to know. And see if I'd change anything...
This year I worked really hard on being the best person I could be. I worked hard on being a better friend and a better person. And I failed some and I succeeded some. But for the most part I did well, I like to think. I made new friends and gave up on some who gave up on me. I started to become me again, and I accepted that I'm not perfect. I'm not everything I want and wanted to be. But I'm getting there. I'm taking the steps I should take and the steps I need to take. And I'll get there in the end. I know I will.
The balance is the key. I need to find the balance. And when I do there'll be no stopping me.
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